The Magic Act

This is in the middle of act one, as part of the vaudeville show. George is the Abe Lincoln impersonator, Peter is the MC, and Roberta is a female magician. Alex sewed a button on Goerges pants but it came off and “Abe” had to do the Gettysburg address while trying to hold up his trousers. He thinks Alex did it on purpose and is out for blood and Alix runs behind the oleo to hide…

                                                                        ALEX

Oh crap! Hide me!

                                                                        LINCOLN

(Opens the lid of a trunk upstage center behind the oleo)

In here, quick!

                                                                                    (Alex climbs in, and Lincoln closes the lid)

                                                                        GEORGE

(Comes around backstage, to the onstage behind the oleo)

Where is he? Where is Alex? This is his fault!

                                                                        LINCOLN

He’s not here, and why would this be his fault? Hasn’t it come off before?

(George runs off stage when the announcement begins in front of the oleo, while Lincoln franticly tries to open the trunk, which appears to be locked.)

ALEX

Get me out!

                                                                        LINCOLN

I’m trying! It won’t open!

(He ducks behind the trunk as Roberta walks on and stands downstage behind the oleo.)

PETER

And now we take you to the realm of the exotic, the mystical, and the mysterious. Prepare to be amazed. Prepare to be enchanted by the beautiful and magical Madam Ravin!

(The oleo rolls up, and the spotlight hits “Madam Ravin,” dressed in a long all-black flapper outfit with “wings” made from the cape she wears attached to straps around her wrists. She never smiles or talks but sings as the music starts. Her act is half magic, half ballet as he moves through various tricks, all in song.)

MAGIC IN MY LIFE (ROBERTA Sung in sultry Marlene Dietrich tones, LINCOLN, in panicked tones)

ROBERTA

            I’ve been around the world and tasted much of life,

            But still, there’s something left that still eludes me.

            I’m not the kind to be mother or a wife,

            But love was out there somewhere and was always meant to be.

            So, I conjured up the future that I longed for

            I cast the incantations to bring that love for me.

            I belief the magic that is love.

            I believe that fate conspires, and angels up above

            send us where we need to find the dreams

              that fit us like a glove,

for I believe in love.

I feel that heart is out there waiting.

I feel this yearning in my breast.

Or am I just anticipating,

nothing that would let my poor heart rest?

I need that magic in my life.

We all need magic in our lives.

I need the magic that love brings.

Please believe me,

So, if there’s magic left to set me free,

 please fly to me.

(She finally comes to the trunk and walks around it while spinning it to show the audience the back. What she doesn’t see is Lincoln clinging to the back, his eyes following the audience as he pans past them, with an anxious look on his face. She finally sees him ( with a very shocked expression) when she opens the trunk and Alex comes up for air as well. She drops the lid on Alex again and yanks Lincoln out on stage as she continues to sing.)

                                                            ROBERTA

I feel that heart is out there waiting.

                                                            LINCOLN

I don’t know what I’m doing here.

                                                ROBERTA

            I feel this yearning in my breast.

                                                            LINCOLN

            And now she’s singing ‘bout her breasts. (Wide-eyed)

                                                            ROBERTA

            Or am I just anticipating?

                                                            LINCOLN

            The look upon my face is clear.

                                                            ROBERTA

            Nothing that would let my poor heart rest.    

                                                            LINCOLN

            If I could go, that would be best.

                                                            ROBERTA

            I need that magic in my life.

                                                            LINCOLN

            I’ll sing, but I don’t know the worlds.

                                                            ROBERTA

            We all need magic in our lives.

                                                            LINCOLN

            I’m lost and looking quite absurd.

                                                            ROBERTA

            I need the magic that love brings.

                                                            LINCOLN

            And now she’s flapping like a bird.

                                                            TOGETHER

            Please believe me,

                                                            ROBERTA

            So, if there’s magic left to set me free, please fly to me.

(At this point, she shoves Lincoln in the trunk with Alix and slams the lid down, stands on it, and climes on top of it, raising a curtain above her head. When it drops, Alex is standing on the     trunk holding a white dove, and both Lincoln and Roberta are absent. Alix steps off and opens the chest, and Roberta rises from it wearing an all-white version of the dress. As she steps out, she makes the bird vanish, then a large empty ornate birdcage is wheeled onstage, and after covering it with a hood, she sings.)

So, if there’s magic left to set me free, please fly to me.                     

(on “me,” she whips it off to reveal Lincoln in it who sings the last line.)

LINCOLN

Help me, please!

(She looks at Lincoln, gives a satisfied nod, takes her bow, walks off stage, leaving Lincoln bewildered in the cage as the oleo rolls down. Peter makes the intro while behind the oleo we see as Margery walk on for her number, passing as her son being wheeled off waving to her. She starts to comment, but the oleo rises again, and she sings.)

                                                PETER

And now, my friends, it’s time for a whole new level of enchantment. We are honored to present the Astrolabe’s latest and biggest star, from Broadway to you, the incomparable Margery Foster.